Thursday, 9 June 2016

Here's why I don't weigh myself


This may sound strange, but I don't know how much I weigh. Haven't done for a couple of years.

I remember a period when I was a teenager when I would weigh myself every day. I became obsessed with the number on the scales, and hated myself for a fluctuation of 2 pounds or so each day (which was obviously just water weight or the time of day that I weighed myself). I would eat as little as possible, sometimes skipping breakfast and only eating a couple of oranges for lunch, and felt absolutely awful. Some of my friends were really slim and I knew that they weighed a lot less than I did, which made me feel even worse - even though I was a good few inches taller than them and curvier.

My weight became a bit of an obsession - when I look back I realise that it was at the start of my depression, and I think it was one of the only things in my life that I could control at that point.

Some time after that I decided that the obsession needed to stop. The number on the scales didn't define me. So I stopped weighing myself so much; perhaps only once a week. And eventually I got to a point where I actually dreaded stepping on the scales, so just stopped. I didn't see the point in making myself feel bad anymore.


Now I still feel exactly the same: stepping on the scales feels exactly like checking my bank balance - a chore and something that I hate doing. I haven't particularly changed clothes size, so I know that I haven't put too much weight on. I eat relatively healthily (but definitely never skip meals any more). I know I could do more exercise, but at the end of the day I am so much happier than when I let my weight define me.

I have bad days and good days with my body - but actually so many more good days than I used to have, even though I'm probably bigger than I was a few years ago. My happiness and mental health are much more important to me now, and I realise that I am much more than a number on a scale. Nobody else looks at me and assesses how much I may weigh, or judges me for it. Plus I love food too much - it also makes me happy to be able to enjoy it.

I think we would all be so much happier if we just focused on being healthy, and stopped letting the scales affect our mood so much. The number on the scale does not tell you how good a person you are; how much you are loved; or how to be happy. Those are much, much more important.
Although difficult, change is always possible. What holds us back from making the changes we desire are our own limiting thoughts and actions.
                   - Satsuki



4 comments:

  1. I completely agree with this - I believe that if you're happy with the way you look and you feel healthy in yourself then that is all you need. Why do you need someone to tell you whether you're in good shape or you're healthy enough? Is it to fit societies standards? Because you definitely don't need to do that if you're happy and to be honest, you can usually tell if you need to change something for your health. I check my weight every now and then, but checking every day isn't good for you anyways because, as you said, everyone fluctuates everyday whether we like it or not. Great post :)

    Katie
    www.katiehodgkinson.com

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  2. Gorgeous photos and a brilliant post, Hannah! I do not weigh myself either, I was forced to have weekly weigh-ins when I was at dance school, and it became an unhealthy way to live and my life was dominated by weight obsessing. I am now happier than I have ever been, I eat what I want and I am a big promoter of self love and positive body image. Happiness is so much more important than a silly number! You go girl!

    Hayley-Eszti | www.hayleyeszti.com

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  3. I love this post Hannah and you look gorgeous! I stopped weighing myself last month for NoWeighMay and I still havent stepped on the scales. Although my mental health hasnt been fantastic recently, thats one less thing for me to worry about and I am just working on being happy with myself :)

    www.discoveringcharlotte.co.uk

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  4. I could have written this post myself I identify with it so much! I went through a period of obsessively weighing myself when I was a younger teenager, and would, like you said, beat myself up if I gained a pound or two. Then, when my body started to change and I couldn't control my weight, I just stopped weighing myself. It was such a relief! Last week, I weighed myself for the first time in 2 years (which was a scary moment), so I really understand where you're coming from.

    Great post and thanks for sharing:)

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